So by now you must know that the second season of “13 Reasons Why” has become available on Netflix. You’ve probably already binge watched it, or are in the midst of watching it. I have, and it’s brought me back to before.
I know that so many people disliked the show in the first place. I know that they thought it was bad acting and a bad plot overall. I guess I must think differently. I thought it was brilliant because it felt like I had an understanding about how I felt. And although it is just a show and just a book, I felt like someone heard my cries.
Did this show trigger something?
Yes. It’s upsetting. But it did. It triggered a lot of pain that I’ve felt in the past. I knew that something like this could bring up some issues, but I still couldn’t resist watching. The tears that every character shed, I could relate to. The sadness death brings up no matter the reason is devastating to anybody. You know I’ve suffered in my own mind before. I know I can ask for help if I need it. The show didn’t scare me from doing that. It just makes my heart hurt. It makes me feel uneasy. My anxiety makes an appearance to shake me from the images I’ve seen.
You can try and say that I shouldn’t be feeling this way as it’s just a show and just a book, but it’s a million different things for millions of people. Being honest though, I should have taken the warnings more seriously. I wasn’t okay for weeks after watching the first season. I was confused and hurt, and just completely empty. We like to pretend that this doesn’t happen, and that there is more help out there then we would ever know. But no one is prepared to know the truth. It happens everywhere and it happens every day. Some people just don’t care, or they pretend that it’s just a bug going around, and the victim is okay. People have tried to tell me that it’s something that maybe I’ve set off in my mind, or I’m watching too much t.v, or playing too many video games, or not getting enough sleep. No. There’s actually something going on and we need to help. Why isn’t it simple enough to say “okay, I’m here to help, so let me help you.” That’s enough. We need support.
Why did I use the term “victim”? That’s what we are. Mental health is being a victim of yourself. You’re trapped in the cells of your thoughts and you’ve got a life sentence. Medication is bail, but you’ve still got to pay the fine to completely set yourself free, but no one has enough money for that, so you remain in cuffs.
It’s hard to talk to other people that may deal with similar issues. It’s all almost like a competition of who is the most unsteady. Who takes the higher dosage of medication. Who’s cried the most. Why? Why are we like this towards each other?
Why haven’t workplaces been addressed to help people that have watched these shows? Yes there are resources, but none that are actually in reach. When you talk to a boss they remain frozen and stunned from the lack of information they have, and then they deem you “unable to handle stress”. That’s what they think you are; stressed. Yeah, we might be, but there’s so much more going on. Stress can be taken away and cured. There is no cure for us.
This isn’t a reach out from me. I’m sort of okay right now. I may need a little while to clear my mind to assure I can move on. And yes, if there is another season, I’m probably going to watch it, and feel the same way directly after. So, just be careful how you post things about this show because who knows how someone is replaying it in their mind. I know that I’m going to ask questions and make sure others are okay because my empathy is stronger than my will.
I’m okay. We’re all okay, even if we aren’t. ❤